Going through a stack of photos from the late 1960s, I ran across some hilarious pictures of one of Mom and Dad’s many social gatherings – a tacky party. Usually scheduled for some time in October, it was our church’s answer to the more common Halloween costume party.
It was the only time I remember seeing our pastor in anything other than a suit. I was used to seeing the deacons wear khakis or coveralls – they were farmers, cattlemen and tradesmen. But the pastor was different. I didn’t know what to think when Brother Nunn showed up at our house for a tacky party in a regular plaid shirt and pants, wearing a hideous wig. His wife, Evie, looked worse, with a loud pink dress and a long red hair piece that looked like she had mugged a hippie on the way to the party.
Fun-loving couples like Lester and Odessa Wells went out of their way to be as outrageous as possible, with mismatched shoes and socks, her slip showing below the hemline, too much makeup and chunky jewelry; he wore his worst overalls and work shirt. They looked like rejects from a Goodwill dumpster, much to the delight of everyone there.
Trying to explain one of these events to someone today would be akin to trying to describe Woodstock. You just had to be there. I realized this when I was attempting to tell one of my younger friends what the word “tacky” meant. “Well, let’s see…” I looked up at the ceiling searching for the right words. “It’s like a cheap costume party. You wear old, mismatched clothes, bad wigs or hairpieces, funny glasses, gaudy jewelry, maybe sloppy, ill-fitting hats, ties or house shoes and either too much or too little makeup.” My friend laughed and quipped, “Sounds like a trip to Wal-Mart to me!” I would have to agree.
Those fun parties of yesteryear definitely wouldn’t have the same punch today as they did then, when people “dressed for town.” I remember Mama polishing her shoes, ironing her good dress and fixing her hair to go to the dentist or doctor. It was a big deal. Not being dressed for town was unthinkable. She even dressed up to go grocery shopping, just in case she ran into someone at the store. Nowadays, people shop in their pajamas (or worse).
Besides dressing “outside the norm,” what made those tacky parties so much fun was the fellowship and laughter they inspired. Playing charades, even dominoes, was just funnier when you looked ridiculous. The food was also one of the highlights – we drank copious amounts of Kool-Aid, tea, coffee and, if we could afford it, some Coke or Grape Nehi. There were plenty of homemade pies, cakes, cookies, caramel popcorn, chips and dips. Mama served it from the kitchen counter or on an extra card table someone brought. She didn’t worry about decorations – the main focus was on the fun. I can’t remember anyone acting uneasy or being intimidated at one of our gatherings. Mama had a way of making everyone feel at home – simplicity at its best.
When I look back on those happy times, I am reminded that things don’t have to be elaborate, showy or expensive to be lovely. Sometimes, I am happiest when I visit a friend for coffee and find her house in disarray, like mine, but her spirit calm and welcoming. Our focus is on each other, not on external things.
I’m reminded that we all have messy lives in one way or another and that’s okay. Life is meant to be experienced with as much joy as we can muster … even if that means we have to “get a little tacky” to do it.
Mama’s Good Chip Dip
You can also use this with veggies for a healthier snack.
2 tablespoons finely chopped onion
1 tablespoon dried parsley
1 tablespoon dill weed
1 teaspoon seasoned salt
1 cup mayo or Miracle Whip
1 cup sour cream
Mix all ingredients together, cover and refrigerate. Best made the day before to allow the flavors to develop. Serves both tacky and non-tacky party-goers!
